Masticated Letter

Item · 1 gp · Weight 0

A wad of crumpled pieces of paper with visible bite marks and traces of saliva. The writing is blurred and indistinct, most of the words are completely illegible, but some fragments are still intact. "Carefully pack up all the relics and valuable magical items and hand them over to the same courier that brought you my potions. Later, I may carve out some time away from my scientific research to sift through the detritus you managed to steal from the crusaders. I might as well not bother, since your finds will almost certainly be of no use to me (unless I find myself in dire need of a paperweight); still, this mission keeps you occupied and gives me an invaluable opportunity to work without you sticking your nose into my experiments. I once again remind you that it is absolutely essential to store the potions in a safe place sealed with a corresponding protective rune. Should these safety measures not be taken, the demons will drink all your stash dry in no time at all, and your master will order me to spend three more days at the cauldron making a new batch. Believe it or not, I have many other important matters to attend to. Should I discover that the potions have mysteriously disappeared, I will not try to look for the culprit: I will punish the person who let it happen, the person who failed to secure them properly. The punishment will be painful, brutal, and utterly inhumane. Remember this. Good luck with conquering whatever you are conquering out there. Xanthir Vang"